Excellence Effect Movement Visits New Orleans

The Excellence Effect Movement recently took their mission of reaching 50 million kids to two New Orleans schools, Schwarz Alternative School and Dr. Martin Luther King High School, which is located in the lower ninth ward.

“Your outstanding presentation, enthusiasm, selfless commitment, and sheer love permeated into our hearts, and showed students that there are persons that dedicate their time, love and efforts into making the lives of children more fulfilling,” School Administrator Mr. Lockett said.

As students suffer from a cultural Excellence Deficit and teachers struggle with lack of programs due to education budget cuts, the aim of the Excellence Effect Movement is to reverse this trend by offering a meaningful character education curriculum at no cost to families and students with a goal of reaching 50 million kids by 2015.

“The Excellence Effect is a program that guides young people toward a positive future full of confidence, motivation, creativity, teamwork, leadership and valuable life principles,” said Bobbi DePorter, President of the non-profit that created the Excellence Effect Movement, Learning Forum International.

At both school assemblies, members of the Transformational Leadership Council, an elite group of many of the world’s greatest transformational leaders, led talks on the 8 Keys of Excellence and interacted in small groups with the students.

The no-cost school program provides K-12 teachers with a full year of character education lesson plans, online resources, training and support.

Bobbi DePorter is the founder and president of Learning Forum International. Bobbi developed the 8 Keys of Excellence 30 years ago as an education tool for students attending her SuperCamp summer enrichment programs. She is the author of The 8 Keys of Excellence – Principles to Live By and has written over a dozen books on teaching and learning, which have been translated into seven languages. Ms. DePorter is also the founder and president of Quantum Learning Network, which offers training to youth, educators and businesses throughout the U.S. and in over 12 other countries. She attended the University of Washington and University of Southern California Graduate School of Business CME program.

“Our kids are at risk – it’s our responsibility to do something” she said.

Florida Father’s Boarding of Daughter’s School Bus is Wrong on Every Level

The actions of the father in Seminole County, Florida who boarded his daughter’s school bus to confront a boy who was bullying her is a shocking example of a parent exercising a primal need to protect instinctually as an animal would do with no rational thought.

Too many people today believe it’s acceptable to react to their emotions, regardless of the consequences. They’re wrong. Not only can an emotional reaction to a situation lead to devastating results, it teaches young people that this type of automatic response is justifiable.

While the Florida father’s actions are, on a very base level, understandable, they are not excusable. Just as a person doesn’t have to say everything they think, they don’t have to act irrationally on every impulse. Humans have the ability to reason and make choices in every situation, even emotionally charged ones.

There’s even less justification for this father’s actions, which clearly were premeditated, given that he was there waiting for the bus to pull up to the stop.

Bullying is reaching epidemic proportions. Kids bully other kids. Parents bully their own kids. And, now, parents are bullying other kids. So how can we stop this ugly animalistic kind of behavior?

First, adults with anger issues need anger management counseling. Fundamentally, they need to understand the difference between “I am angry.” and “I have anger.” When a person thinks “I am angry…” their brain completes the thought with … “so I have the right to react however I want.” A person who understands that they are feeling anger learns to deal with this emotion rationally, without acting out inappropriately.

Second, we need to teach our children so that they learn appropriate behavior at a young age. Schools must instill a set of values in young people that becomes so habitual over time – literally creating a solid, positive core – that when confronted with an emotionally explosive situation as a teen or an adult, their automatic response will be value driven. Every school needs to have yearlong character programs that are integrated into the daily curriculum. Research on the character development program I created last year, Communities of Excellence, which teaches students the 8 Keys of Excellence in the classroom, has shown significantly positive results in student behavior.

Third, these same core character principles must be integrated into families. Parents are role models for their children and they have a responsibility to model positive behavior and values – it’s the powerful teaching they can do.  Combine this with conversations about their family’s values, it can make real change. It’s easy for parents to think that their kids know what values the family stands for. After all, they’re part of the family. But it’s best not to assume and be focused, clear and specific about your family’s values.

Fourth, parents should help their children deal with incidents of bullying by building a close connection with their child with good communication. It’s a piece in creating what we like to call a “home court advantage.” There are three key ways to build your connection and communication with your child:

1.  Listen More/Talk Less

If there is a lack of communication in your home, the situation won’t improve by trying to force it. In general, be ready with your ears when your son or daughter does decide to open up, where you may find early clues if your child is being bullied.

2.  Build Confidence

Make sure that you are acknowledging the effort your child puts into projects and homework. Your child may not be able to guarantee an “A” grade, but they can guarantee that they are giving their best effort. It empowers them to know that they have complete control over the effort they put into something. It builds their pride and confidence. This confidence carries over into other areas of their life. When a student carries themselves with confidence, they are less likely to be bullied, and if they are, have the confidence to speak up.

3.  Build Authentic Bridges to Your Kids

Parents can begin to build a bridge by showing a sincere interest in each child’s hobby or passion. It doesn’t matter if it’s a sport, in the arts, or creating video game software; if there is interest on the parents’ part, the child feels good. Parents can further strengthen this bridge by participating in the hobby/activity with the child, as appropriate, and letting the child become the “teacher.”

The Florida man’s actions are yet another example of the excellence deficit that is rampant in our society today. People have the attitude that “anything goes” and that they’re somehow entitled to do or say anything. We need to end this downward spiral and begin living lives of excellence founded in core principles that make each of us, and the world, better.

What Parents Can Do About Teen Bullying

Photo by JordyR

Teen bullying is a major topic in the news these days given the recent charges against six teenagers involved in the case of a Massachusetts 15-year-old girl, Phoebe Prince, who hanged herself in January.

Bullying is a widespread issue in America. It is estimated that anywhere from 11 to 25 percent of teens are the target of bullying in the United States. Additionally, it’s been reported that 160,000 students miss school every day to avoid being bullied by their peers.

In light of the unfortunate case of Miss Prince, the governor of Massachusetts recently signed a bill requiring teachers to report bullying to principals. While legislators are moving forward rapidly to enact laws against bullying, this problem will likely remain a prominent part of teenage life. Because of this, it’s important that you as a parent know what to do to avoid a tragic outcome in your family if one of your kids becomes a victim of bullying.

One of the major problems among students who are bullied is that they become so embarrassed and humiliated that they disconnect from their friends and family, refusing to divulge anything that they are going through. Many victims incorrectly assume that because a person or a small group is picking on them, the whole world views them that way. This humiliation and sense of solitude can lead to depression and, as we’re seeing in some cases, to suicide.

Parents of teens who have taken their own life have revealed later that they weren’t aware of their child’s problem. The kids had not felt confident or comfortable enough in their relationship with their parents to confide in them and seek their help. One parent of a teen who took his own life said, “If only he’d known how much he mattered to so many people.”

Building a Home Court Advantage

So, what can you do to grow a closer connection to your teens? My advice is to build what I call a home court advantage.

We hear of a home court advantage in sports, where the home team enjoys an edge as it feeds off the support of its fans. In families, the home court advantage helps teens reduce stress, cope with challenges and actually feel good about their life. In addition, it strengthens the parent-teen relationship to the point where the teen will confide in his parents during times of trouble.

Building a home court advantage is not a quick fix; it’s a long-term process. The trust and the connection must grow over time. Here are four key steps in effectively creating a home court advantage environment in your home:

1.  Listen More, Talk Less
If there is a lack of communication in your home, trying to force your teen to engage in conversation will most likely do more harm than good. In general, be ready with your ears when your teen does decide to open up, even if it’s to share simple news.

One great place to engage with your teen is when you’re driving in the car together. When you are sitting beside each other in the front seats of the car, you’re facing forward. With both of you looking straight ahead, you’ve created a non-confrontational setting, in which a conversation can start and flow more easily.

Also, whether it’s in the car or somewhere else, when your teen is sharing some news, a good way to encourage more dialogue is by saying, “Tell me more.” This simple request gives your teen an indication that you’re interested in what they’re saying. At the same time, it’s completely non-judgmental; you’re not offering an opinion on what was just said.

2.  Ask…Don’t Tell
Do you like to talk with people who don’t understand you? Of course you don’t. Teens are the same way. Often when parents attempt to provide heartfelt advice, even with the best of intentions, teens will perceive it as a “lecture” and automatically shut down the communication process.

Asking a question, on the other hand, will generate a response and lead to further dialogue. A question, particularly one that requires more than a yes or no answer, engages the brain. It’s a classic technique in sales that is used to learn more about the prospective buyer and to build rapport. And it’s something that works well in families with teens, as well.

Asking more and telling less also gives parents a better opportunity to learn what pressures their teens may be under. Whether it’s bullying, relationships, grades, or something else, the information will more likely come to light by asking simple, non-probing questions.

3. Share Your Values; Discover Your Teen’s
It’s easy for parents to think that their kids know what values the family stands for. After all, they’re part of the family. But it’s best not to assume that they’re either focused or clear on your family’s values.

Have a casual conversation, perhaps at the dinner table, where you discuss what values your family stands for. Ask your teens what their values are. If they need time to think about it, suggest revisiting the topic at dinner in a day or two.

Once you’ve had this conversation, encourage your teen to seek out others in school with similar values. By being part of a group, a teen is less susceptible to being bullied. And by being part of a group of like-minded teens who share common values and interests, an individual is less likely to be ostracized.

4. Build Authentic Bridges to Your Teen
The prime directive in our summer enrichment programs is “Theirs to Ours, Ours to Theirs.” What this means is in order for our staff to teach the students who attend SuperCamp, first they must enter the kids’ world. In other words, our staff must connect with the kids, which gives them permission to teach.

This strategy applies to building a home court advantage, as well. Parents can begin to build a bridge by showing a sincere interest in a hobby or something else that their teen is passionate about. It doesn’t matter if it’s a sport, in the arts, or creating video game software; if there is interest on the parents’ part, the teen feels good.

Parents can further strengthen this bridge by participating in the hobby or activity with the teen, as appropriate. Finally, a third level in building the bridge using this strategy is to let the teen become the “teacher” by showing the parent how to do something that the teen is good at.

Creating a meaningful connection with your teen takes time. But it’s an excellent investment on your part. It will ensure that a sufficient level of trust is present, so that if your teen faces a personal crisis, such as being bullied, he or she will want to come to you for advice and support.

Have you had to deal with bullying in your family? If so, how did you help your child cope? Please share in the comments below.

9 Ways to Connect with Your Teen

For many years at SuperCamp, parents would ask us if we could start a program for them, to help them learn what their kids were learning at SuperCamp. Ask and you shall receive. A few years ago we started Parent Weekend, an intensive three-day parent support program that coincides with the final three days of a 7-day Junior Forum or a 10-day Senior Forum at the same location. The parents who attend love it, including graduating with their kids on the final day.

In addition to exposing parents to many of the learning and life skills their sons and daughters discover at SuperCamp, we also talk with parents about how they can support their children at home. Here are nine great tips we share specifically with parents of Senior Forum students, also known as “teens”:

1. Really listen. Don’t try to listen while doing something else. Put your chores aside so your teen knows you are paying attention.

2. Take the long view. Remember, minor mishaps aren’t major catastrophes. All incidents provide opportunities to practice good communication. Often, categorizing incidents according to their importance will help keep responses and consequences appropriate.  Choose only the most important issues to evoke the strongest consequences.

3. Make time for being together. Find activities you enjoy doing together and pursue them. If your invitation gets turned down, keep trying!

4. Tolerate differences. View your teenager as an individual distinct from you. However, this doesn’t mean you can’t state your opinion if you disagree.

5. Respect your teen’s privacy. Just because he/she wants to keep their door locked, doesn’t mean he/she is doing anything you wouldn’t approve of. But if a behavior is worrying you, speak up!

6. State facts instead of opinions when you praise or discuss problems. Ask your teen to demonstrate “Open the Front Door” – a communication tool we use at SuperCamp.

• O – is an objective observation about the situation.

• T – is a thought or opinion about what you observed.

• F – is a feeling you had about what you observed.

• D – is what you want, your desire or outcome of the situation.

7. Ask your teen about his/her learning style. Knowing there are differences goes a long way toward explaining why we have problems understanding and communicating with some people and not with others.  When you know what cues he/she picks up on most easily (visual, auditory or kinesthetic), you can take steps to help him/her learn faster and more easily.

8. Support a positive attitude about learning. Create a positive study environment that includes appropriate reference materials, music and reminders that he/she is intelligent (like old report cards, awards, notes from teachers). It is also helpful to demonstrate your own positive feelings about learning.

9. Celebrate success! Positive feedback goes a long way to encourage repeat behavior.  Each accomplishment by a family member deserves acknowledgment, whether verbal or by means of a special treat, like a trip to the movies, a special dessert, or posting on the bulletin board.

Parent Weekend is available at three sessions this summer:

• July 3-5 at Stanford University
• July 16-18 at Colorado College
• August 13-15 at Brown University

For more info, visit SuperCamp.com.

SuperCamp Info Webinars

Got questions? We have answers!

We’re holding an informational webinar for parents (and students) who want to know more about SuperCamp. The webinar is set to run twice in February and again in March, just so everyone has a chance to participate.

The February dates and times are Thursday, February 25 at 7:00 p.m. EST and Saturday, February 27 at 11:30 a.m. EST. The webinar is just a half-hour long. In the first 20 minutes, Chicka Elloy, our Programs Manager, will lead viewers through a fast-paced overview of SuperCamp, answering some of the most popular questions we get from parents. During the presentation, parents can type in questions that Chicka and our Customer Service & Enrollments Manager, Ruth Everett, will answer in the final 10 minutes.

If you are looking at summer enrichment camps for your son or daughter, then be sure to sign up for this free webinar. And tell your friends! You can learn more and register at www.SuperCampWebinars.com. Space is limited, so sign up today.

Update: The March dates have been announced! They are as follows:

• Thursday, March 25 at 7:00 p.m. EDT, and

• Saturday, March 27 at 11:30 a.m. EDT

You can register for them here.

Use It or Lose It! – Applying SuperCamp Skills Throughout the Year

Photo by D Sharon Pruitt

Imagine an ice cream cone. Two mammoth-size scoops of your favorite flavor perched ever-so-gently on top. Sounds amazing, right? The only problem is the summer heat blasting down on you and that precious dessert. The logical solution: eat now, eat fast (avoid brainfreeze!).

Summer is officially gone, our kids have begrudgingly made their way back to school, and it’s very possible that SuperCamp was the most delicious treat they got all summer. The day they graduated from camp, that SuperCamp ice cream cone was fresh, cool, and seemingly endless. But we all know that the first day of school is just like a heat wave – new friends, new classes, and pressure to fall back into old habits. If we don’t keep eating, all that good stuff will have melted onto the floor.

In order to make the camp-to-school transition smooth and ongoing, we at SuperCamp have created a number of strategies to assist you and your SuperCamp grad in holding onto powerful strategies, mindsets, and goals:

• Our grad support hub is QuantumLearner.com, which will be constantly updated throughout the year. This is where you can access pictures from your student’s SuperCamp experience. One way to offer support is to print off pictures of your son or daughter with their friends at camp and post them near their ‘Homework Spot’ at home. This will keep them enthused about using SuperCamp skills throughout the year. QuantumLearner.com is your first stop for Grad Support.

• NEW FOR 2009! We are proud to introduce our Grad Support Hotline at 1-800-285-3276, extension 170. Have your camper leave a message (anything regarding SuperCamp skills and tools) and one of our trained SuperCamp Facilitators will call back with a refresher, pep talk, or whatever is needed! Your son or daughter may be hesitant to ask for help; let them know that they might get to speak with a Facilitator who was at their camp and that all of our Facilitators are dynamic, fun, and love to help! Again, call our main number at 1-800-285-3276 and dial extension 170.

• Refresher videos will be available once-a-month on YouTube and QuantumLearner.com based on topics that are appropriate for the time of year, (i.e. Test-Taking Skills in December for Midterms). No boring lectures – all the sweetness of SuperCamp in a quick, informative fashion.

• Visit our student and parent support page for a quick review of some of the most common SuperCamp support topics.

• Facebook! As you’re reading this, it’s very possible that your child is currently on Facebook or has been at some point during the last 2 hours. With that knowledge, we have created a number of groups and support networks and even an official SuperCamp Facebook page as a way of bringing our world to theirs. Encourage your kids to keep in touch with their SuperCamp friends and staff members and look at pictures from camp. Facebook is a great way to stay connected, however, if your student has questions for staff about SuperCamp curriculum, please direct them to the Grad Support Hotline (800-285-3276×170).

• Find a time (after asking permission) to look over your student’s SuperCamp playbook with them and ask questions about learned skills. Top things to ask about: Goals, the Quantum Reading process, Strategies (SLANT, Notes TM, Mind Mapping), and the 8 Keys of Excellence.

• If you’re interested in having your son or daughter come back to SuperCamp in 2010 (and they were a student in Senior Forum), encourage them to come back on Leadership Training Team to further develop their skills while getting the chance to have a new, different camp experience. For more information, check out our teen summer camps page and scroll down to Leadership Training Team or call 1-800-285-3276.

We are so excited to have had your student at SuperCamp this summer and are committed to making sure you get the return on your investment. Encourage your kids to use our resources – we want to keep them successful.

We’re looking forward to helping you and your student keep that ice cream cone fresh and “non-melty” throughout the school year!

Do You Know How to Protect Your Kids Online?

Did you know that in just four years, social websites like Facebook, Myspace, and Twitter have become bigger than TV? Ninety-three percent of teens have social accounts online and kids as young as 7th and 8th graders are spending up to four hours per day online. There’s a huge upside to knowing how to leverage the full potential of Facebook, Twitter, and other social networking sites, but there’s also a risk if used improperly.

That’s why you, as parents, need to attend our special two-hour seminar on July 18, entitled “The Secrets Behind Facebook, MySpace, and Twitter.”

At this seminar, you’ll learn what you need to know to help your kids, including the “best practices” of social networking for students:

• Safe online homework collaboration
• Reliable online researching
• Online college recruiting secrets
• Best sites for networking
• How to make extra summer cash online

You’ll also learn how to help your children avoid the dangers of social networking, including:

• Identity theft protection
• Cyberbullying support
• Damaging personal reputations
• Hurting college admission and job opportunities

“It’s important that kids understand how to take advantage of what these sites have to offer. And it’s just as important that both they and their parents know the right way to do it.” - SuperCamp president Bobbi DePorter

This unique seminar for parents is from 9:30 – 11:30 a.m. on Saturday, July 18 at the QLN Conference Center, 1938 Avenida del Oro, Oceanside, CA 92056. Click here for directions.

The cost to attend is only $25 per person and just $35 per couple.

Enroll online or call us at 800-285-3276, ext. 115.

So if you live in Southern California and have kids between the ages of 10 and 18, don’t miss out on this special event, and be sure to share this opportunity with your friends!

Stars of The Secret Team Up with SuperCamp to Make a Difference

Exciting news for parents of teens everywhere!!

On Thursday, June 18, you will have a very special opportunity to listen in as six leading human development and youth achievement experts from The Secret, The Passion Test, and SuperCamp discuss ways to help parents deal with teens who are fearful of and negative about the future.

“Shifting Teens’ Focus to a Positive Future” will run about 3 1/2-hours from 7:00 – 10:30 p.m. eastern daylight time (4:00 – 7:30 p.m. pacific daylight time) and is free to parents who register at www.positiveteenfuture.com. It will consist of six 35-40-minute one-on-one conversations with these six experts, each of whom addresses a particular area of relevance to teens. The speakers delve into such subjects as passion, motivation, visioning, excellence, and happiness.

The speakers include three participants from the popular and successful movie, The Secret:

• John Assaraf
• Lisa Nichols
• Marci Shimoff

Also participating are Janet Attwood, from The Passion Test, our very own president and co-founder Bobbi DePorter, and Harrison Klein, an inspiring writer and speaker.

Bobbi said that the idea for this event came from feedback she has received from many parents who have expressed concern over the negative effect the recession and other news is having on their teens and pre-teens:

“SuperCamp is all about creating a positive vision for the future with students, so this teleseminar with all these great speakers, was a perfect way to provide parents with some much-needed help.”

Don’t miss out! Register right now at www.positiveteenfuture.com.

Teen Success in Challenging Times: Part 5

This is the fifth and final post in the “Teen Success in Challeging Times” series. I hope you found value in each post and use the tips to build a stronger relationship with your teen. I also encourage you to listen to the parent support teleseminar led by SuperCamp president and co-founder Bobbi DePorter discussing these same important issues.

How can I instill core values that will both sustain my teen through challenging times and be a foundation for the rest of their lives?

What you want to do, as a parent, is create a “home court advantage” for your kids. In sports, a home court advantage means that the home team has the support of fans and the comfort level of being in familiar surroundings. In your family, you can build this same feeling of support and comfort.

Your goal is to instill a sense of safety, support, and belonging. In doing so, your teen will be comfortable knowing he or she can turn to you for help, even during tough times.

A big part of establishing a home court advantage is recognizing the values and beliefs that the family lives by. If they’re not talked about, then a teen will make assumptions about what they are and these assumptions aren’t always positive. A family’s values, beliefs, and traditions are a constant through good times and bad. They’re a fall-back, a guiding light, for your kids to help them make the right decisions even when you’re not around.

At SuperCamp we follow eight core values, which we call the 8 Keys of Excellence. The keys are Integrity, Failure Leads To Success, Speak With Good Purpose, This Is It, Commitment, Ownership, Flexibility, and Balance. We practice these values daily and use them to guide everything that we do, both at camp and in our personal lives.

What are your family’s core values? How are you displaying them at home?

If you missed the first 4 posts in this series, you can find them here:

• Teen Success in Challenging Times: Practical Tips on How You Can Help Your Teen
• Teen Success in Challenging Times: Part 2
• Teen Success in Challenging Times: Part 3
• Teen Success in Challenging Times: Part 4

Teen Success in Challenging Times: Part 4

How can I strengthen the connection I have with my teen?

Sometimes parents don’t get a clear picture of their child’s experiences because the information is filtered through their own adult points of view. Don’t try to solve a problem before fully understanding your teen’s perspective.

Teens may think, “Mom and Dad don’t understand me, they have no idea what it’s like to be me.” Teens don’t yet have the emotional strength that adults do. As a result, they can go from happy-go-lucky to making snippy comments or having sulking bouts.

When parents see these sudden changes in behavior, they instinctively want to take action to fix it. But, often times, these well-intended actions to make things better only makes it worse.

So, instead of fixing it right away, try to initiate a conversation. Start by trying to pick a time when you think your son or daughter will be receptive to having a conversation, for example, when you’re in the car together.

When you are able to engage your teen, be attentive. Listen more and talk less. If you seize the moment by launching into your side of the conversation, chances are your teen will perceive it to be a lecture and either tune out or get argumentative. Ask questions, then be calm and wait for an answer. Be calm and wait. Try to break down an issue, concern, or topic into smaller parts, so you can ask a question that is fairly easy for your teen to answer. If you get too short of an answer say, “Tell me more.” Eventually, you will draw your teen into a more relaxed conversation.

When you are listening, make a conscious effort to listen to understand versus listening to manipulate. A useful communication tool is OTFD (Open The Front Door), which stands for observation, thoughts, feelings and desires. Here’s how it can be used to start a conversation with your teen about how the economy or a situation within the family is affecting them:

“I know there is lot going on right now. I think some of it might be affecting you. I’m concerned that you’re concerned. Let’s chat.”

This technique is simple and effective because it tells your teen why you want to initiate a dialogue.

Have you listened to the teleseminar for parents that was held recently with SuperCamp president and co-founder Bobbi DePorter? If you’re interested in learning more about how to communicate with your teen, I highly recommend checking it out.

If you missed parts 1, 2 and 3 of this series, you can find them here:

• Teen Success in Challenging Times: Practical Tips on How You Can Help Your Teen
• Teen Success in Challenging Times: Part 2
• Teen Success in Challenging Times: Part 3